Thursday, May 8, 2014

Happy Mother's Day! Mom I love you and thank you for never giving me to the gypsies!


Happy Mother's Day

 

It is once again that day of the year when we honor all those precious ladies in our lives whether they are with us now or they have proceeded us into the afterlife. It is a long running joke that Mom's work 364 days a year and have one off but even then they still work. Being a mom is a tough job and let me tell ya…no one told me how tough it would be. So let us take a stroll down memory lane and then praise the women who have nurtured us in our lives.

My earliest memories of my Mom come from her holding me, making no bake oatmeal cookies and her laugh. She has this amazing laugh that just seeps into your soul. You can instantly tell if she's giving someone the polite "I really don't like you or what you just said" laugh and the one that is all wrapped up in mothery goodness.

My mom is pretty damn amazing. She can run circles around me, out cook me even on my best day and has so much talent. She has given me a wealth of advice over the years. She was my mother first and foremost and now she has become a mother and a friend. I can tell her anything and know that she will tell me if it is a crap idea or it is one worth pursuing. She has been the referee between my siblings and myself for 36 years.

My mother has also been a bane in my own attempts at child rearing. She embraced being a Gammy very easily because she knew her time had finally come. She would be getting the ultimate paybacks. She became the greatest thing since toast when it came to her grandchildren. Don't like dinner? Well she would fix them something they wanted. (Note: Sasha, Courtney and myself were always told to either eat it or go hungry. I tell the girls that now.)

Chocolate for breakfast? Sure. Oh you want to eat a bunch of sugar, take no nap and then go home to your moms? Absolutely!

A year or two ago, when dealing with my own teens, I called her and Dad to apologize to them. My words exactly? "You were right. I was wrong." I didn't have to say much more. They knew.

When I became a Mom I thought I would do everything the right way. I read books. I talked to friends. I thought I had it in the bag. Kennedy came along and I pushed her to do everything bigger, better and faster. She was walking by 5 months and bottle and potty trained by 1. She was very cognizant and had an incredible vocabulary by 2. She was also spoiled rotten.

Maesin came along roughly 1 year and 3 weeks from Kennedy's birth. (No it was not on purpose.) That time around? Uh yeah. We are lucky Maesin is walking and talking today. I was so laid back with her. I didn't rush anything and probably, truth be told, didn't even make a conscious effort. Kennedy was Type A personality from the moment she caterwauled into my life. Maesin was the laid back siesta.

Now kids are tricky creatures. As a Mom I get to see all of my best traits in the girls. As a Mom I get to see all of the worst traits. My abilities are theirs and my liabilities are with them as well. I am afraid one is too demanding of herself, as well as so very brash, and I fear that the other will never take a stance in the world, that she is too laid back. They are two polar opposites and I see parts of myself in each one.

When you have children you get a wealth of advice from people, friends, strangers and books. You crank up the worry meter to a 10 and become convinced that this world is going to harm your children. You sanitize everything. Then they come and you want to kick some people's asses. They warned you about the terrible 2's but they didn't say squat about how little kids will play with poop. They didn't warn you that you will change shirts often because your precious will upchuck on you.

They also didn't tell you that your heart become so incredibly fragile. If they are sick you stay up all night. Heaven forbid they have to stay in a hospital because you will cry each night as you sleep on the little bench in the room, praying that they get better soon. You sit back silently as they grow and have to learn to defend themselves from others. You would give every last breath to protect them.

Mom's are the most incredible creatures on the planet. Just when you are going along in life and think your heart cannot become any bigger…it does. And I want to point out that having children is not necessarily a prerequisite to being a Mom. You do not have to be related to someone by blood to have an incredible influence over them. You may simply be a friend of someone who has a child. The only requirement is love.

Here is to you! Mom's of the world take a collective sigh, take a long soak in the tub and remember that no one gets out of this alive. Your kids won't be the death of you (hopefully) and you will earn each and every wrinkle that comes with the territory. Your favorite outfit can be replaced when destroyed by the kids and you may even have a clean house now and again.

Mom I love you to the moon and back and I'm very glad you survived my teenage years. Once again let me just say that, "You were right and I was wrong. About pretty much everything. Oh and thank you for not giving us to the gypsies."

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